**********
I do not remember when I first came out discreetly. Although 2 years is short, but it did not stop me from saying that I've been thru with many ups and downs, things that got to do with 2 major things in the rainbow life.
Friendships and Relationships
I have learned from experience that friendship can come and go with just one finger snap. This also open up my eyes that I need to be careful when making new friends, coz some friends just don't know how to appreciate another friend.If I were to tell you each of those bad stories, I'm very sure that this blog will be so long that you will get bored reading it. Besides, past is past. Let bygone be BYGONES.
However, not all friendship are ugly. There are a lot of beautiful people out there that I have met and they have been wonderful to me, and me being wonderful to them as well that we been keep in touch with them until now. Just like old classic quote says; FRIENDSHIP WILL NEVER END (And it only applies to my friends who are still keeping in touch with me).
In relationship wise, some people were surprised that I'm not attached with someone. Like I said, I had been through with Ups and Downs in Friendship and Relationship. What hurt the most is being so close (What Hurt The Most - Rascall Flatt) when someone suddenly break your heart by either do something behind your back, have no more feeling with you, and vice versa, and the worse part is when 'Walk Away' (Walk Away - Kristine W) .
Whatever happens, it was already happen and let the history become part of my lesson to learn so that as I move on, I would be more extra careful when comes to relationship, of which once in a while I may lose focus and end up falling into someone, until RC told me that after knowing me for 2 years, I am still not change. This is true. I am what I am. I just don't care whatever he says, coz this matter is not all about him. It's all about me. It's my life. Let me be the one to settle this shit alone.
In fact, previously I was dating with someone, but only to find out from RC, JK and even my best friend Auntie Diva that 'that person' are not into relationship, which is confusing and hurt me. To start my year afresh, I declared myself as being what I am as of the status before I met that guy.
Just as I did that, he send me an sms that came up with the 4 letter and it was sweet one. That got me into confusion about his feelings towards me. Until now I am still figure out our status of myself and him. Probably just 'date'?? Probably just friend?? Probably just fling?? Probably just for fun?? I do not want to put so much hope on this.
As long as he didn't declare or ask me be his lover, I shall not declare myself as 'in relationship'. I just don't want to hurt myself anymore. Not for anyone who wanted to play a fool with my heart.
Meanwhile, options open to everyone, and accordingly to JK's fengshui tips, I should be getting the one who will be my long term before Chinese New Year. Now, who could that lucky guy be? And will this 'prediction' come true or just a lie? Again, I won't put too much high hope on this.
But then, I have friend who introduced me his friend for dinner and we both chat as friend. Just a normal chat. First impression towards him, so far so good, but feeling wise..it was not there yet.
Another one told me that he has the feeling on me. I just don't know how to react on this and was speechless, but I put up so much of courage just to tell him that 'Go With The Flow'. Anyway, better not to ruin that kind of friendship especially that I know him in the class and only start to chat with each other just few weeks ago.
Others are at everywhere; websites, MSN, YAHOO...bla bla bla.. Well guys, I would really love to move on further with you, but I don't think I'm ready yet. Besides it's too early to know whether you are the one for me or not. To some, they were ok about it and we both maintain as friend. To some, they couldn't take it until they eventually deleted me as friend or even their crush. I just don't know what to say about this and there's no comment about it already.
What I can do for now is to just continue focus on my work, that's all. I do believe that one day there will be someone who will come in into my life and will do whatever normal couple normally do. *Fingers cross*
Hugs
A.D
4 comments:
Don't bother classifying what you have with that dude. Just go with the flow and see where it goes. If it doesn't work, there's always others out there who are single. :)
Every relationship is a lesson afterall.
aaww...thanks buddy..true enough, just go with the flow and see where it gona take me.
Great post. You have a big heart and that will always pay back to you in the end.
Thanks Paul. Big hugs to you
Post a Comment